Yanina Manolova's Blog

***

2011-04-17T08:55:00.000-07:00

"If a fish is born in your aquarium and you call him John, write out a birth certificate, tell him about his family history, and two minutes later he gets eaten by another fish- that's tragic. But it's only tragic because you projected a separate self where there was none. You got hold of a fraction of dynamic process, a molecular dance, and made a separate entity out of it."- Eckhart Tolle

"The Precious Present" - Spencer Johnson

2011-04-14T17:20:00.000-07:00

"The present is what is.

It is precious.

Even if I do not know why.

It is already just the way

It is supposed to be.

When I see the present,

Accept the present, and

Experience the present

I am well, and

I am happy.

Pain is the difference

Between what is

And

What I want it to be.

When I feel quilty

Over my imperfect past,

Or I am anxious

Over my uncertain future,

I do not live in

The Present

Then I experience pain.

I make myself ill.

And I am unhappy.

My past was

The present.

And my future will be

The present.

The present moment is

The only reality

I ever experience.

As long as I

continue to stay

In the present,

I am happy forever:

Because forever is always

The present.

The present is simply

Who I am

Just the way I am...

Right now."

- Spencer Johnson

Nothing But the Truth | Official Trailer

2011-04-14T10:05:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-l5cDuBqBI

‎"There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery" by Portia Nelson

2011-04-03T07:51:00.001-07:00

Veronica Guerin film

2011-04-03T07:49:00.000-07:00

‎"Based on a true story, this is about the Irish journalist Veronica Guerin (Cate Blanchett), a reporter for The Sunday Independent, who exposed some of Dublin's most powerful crime barons and drug lords in 1996. But later that year she was gunned down by assasins hired by the same criminal drug lords she exposed."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9QBMrFw9Xo

"Finding Happiness" By Nadia Ballas-Ruta

2011-04-03T06:55:00.000-07:00

"It was a Thursday night in July of 1996 when my quest for finding happiness began. I was sitting on the floor of my luxury apartment doing paperwork when it hit me that the path I was on was not the path for me."

http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/finding-happiness/

Chopra Center Radio- The Law of Least Effort: The Power in Acceptance

2011-04-03T06:53:00.000-07:00

"As we were growing up, many of us were taught that in order to achieve success or fulfill a goal, we had to work hard, push ourselves past resistance, and go the extra mile. While the ability to follow through and see a project through its completion is extremely valuable, there is also great value in letting things be easy . . . in trusting that everything is unfolding as it should and that the right answers, solutions, and ideas will come to us if we stop trying so hard."

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/chopracenter/2011/02/23/the-law-of-least-effort-the-power-in-acceptance

A few inspirational quotes

2011-04-03T06:43:00.000-07:00

"Freedom from the desire for an answer is essential to the understanding of a problem" - J. Krishnamurti

"In detachment lies the wisdom of uncertainty . . . in the wisdom of uncertainty lies the freedom from our past, from the known, which is the prison of past conditioning. And in our willingness to step into the unknown, the field of all possibilities, we surrender ourselves to the creative mind that orchestrates the dance of the universe."- Deepak Chopra

"To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease, and lightness. This state is then no longer dependent upon things being in a certain way, good or bad. Things, people, or conditions that you thought you needed for your happiness now come to you with no struggle or effort on your part, and you are free to enjoy and appreciate them - while they last." - Eckhart Tolle

"Yoga believes in transforming the individual before transforming the world. Whatever change we want to happen outside should happen within. If you walk in peace and express that peace in your very life, others will see you and learn something."- Sri Swami Satchidananda

Institute of Documentary Film - Czech Docs Project - Sofia's Last Ambulance

2011-04-03T06:41:00.000-07:00

"Throughout Bulgaria, financial support from the EU remains largely ineffective as the country’s state budget is absorbed by a powerful mafia. One of the most tragic casualties of the state is the medical system. After 20 years of capitalism, the number of ambulances in Sofia has dropped from 140 to 13. If you suffer a heart attack you can wait up to 5 hours for an ambulance to arrive. Where are all the ambulances?"

http://www.dokweb.net/en/documentary-network/east-european-docs/-sofia-s-last-ambulance-4713/

Incarcerated Mothers, a story by Yanina Manolova for VJ Movement

2011-01-29T14:42:00.000-08:00

A story that I worked on in the last couple of months, just got completed.

Like over two million other children in the United States, six-year-old Keara has a parent in prison. Her mother was sentenced to four years and 11 months in the Ohio Reformatory for Women for non-violent drug offenses. Keara and her younger brother, Keo, live with their grandparents in Nelsonville, Ohio.

http://www.vjmovement.com/truth/894?fq=dshow.all&fq=dorder.hot&fq=tab.list

"Who Am I?"

2011-01-29T14:41:00.000-08:00

Addressed to young students from Mumbai city life, this talk explores the fundamental question: Who am I? Am I my body, my feelings, or thoughts? Or am I something more than all these?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AsDziSpEyQ&feature=related

Consuming Kids: The Commercialization of Childhood

2011-01-29T14:40:00.001-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPZiqgq_DFY

Youssou N'Dour featuring Neneh Cherry - 7 Seconds

2011-01-29T14:39:00.000-08:00

BEAUTIFUL video and song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqCpjFMvz-k

The Cave: An Adaptation of Plato's Allegory in Clay

2011-01-29T14:37:00.000-08:00

Remembering and thinking about Plato's Allegory of The Cave.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=69F7GhASOdM

The 7 Mayan Prophecies: Destruction or Evolution?

2011-01-29T14:36:00.000-08:00

http://yucatantoday.com/en/topics/7-mayan-prophecies-destruction-or-evolution

"L'appartement" film trailer

2011-01-29T14:34:00.000-08:00

A must see film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwapQhrZ-D0

"Drug Addicts Paid To Not Have Kids (Ever)"

2011-01-29T14:31:00.000-08:00

American Barbara Harris offers drug addicts in London 300 pounds to get a vasectomy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmY4qpPcSb4

Charles Bukowski (Love Is a Dog from Hell: Poems, 1974-1977)

2011-01-29T14:22:00.000-08:00

There is a loneliness in this world so great that you can see it in the slow movement of the hands of a clock.
people so tired mutilated either by love or no love.
people just are not good to each other one on one.
the rich are not good to the rich the poor are not good to the poor.
we are afraid.
our educational system tells us that we can all be big-ass winners.
it hasn't told us about the gutters or the suicides.
or the terror of one person aching in one place alone
untouched unspoken to
watering a plant.

— Charles Bukowski (Love Is a Dog from Hell: Poems, 1974-1977)

Bulgarian Prosecutors Look into Deaths of 238 Children in Care. September 23, 2010

2010-10-05T10:04:00.000-07:00

I thought this madness in Bulgaria is over.. But obviously it's not..

Prosecutors inconclusively investigated homes for disabled children after a 2007 BBC documentary revealed appalling suffering in one of them – in the village of Mogilino – eventually forcing its closure.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=944239315372248151#
But dozens of similar houses of pain remain, Ms Tavanier said.

Here is the whole article http://www.novinite.com/view_news.php?id=120412

The government now plans to shut by 2013 all 27 remaining institutions for children with serious disabilities. Most of these facilities are situated in poor remote villages. Almost 98 percent of abandoned children in Bulgaria still have parents somewhere and social workers are seeking to encourage them to take their children back or place them in foster care. http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5g1oa_rCuxc7DwuXNWb05u9eY-X0g

The public campaign of BHC aims to bring to justice the persons and institutions guilty of the crimes committed in the Bulgarian homes for children with mental disabilities.
http://forsakenchildren.bghelsinki.org/en/

Prison Valley. The Prison Industry. A web documentary by David Dufresne & Philippe Brault.

2010-10-04T10:00:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Cañon City, Colorado.
A town in the middle of nowhere with 36,000 souls and 13 prisons, one of which is Supermax, the new 'Alcatraz' of America. A prison town where even those living on the outside live on the inside. A journey into what the future might hold.

http://prisonvalley.arte.tv/?lang=en

The Medical Heroin Experiment by National Geographic Channel

2010-10-04T09:24:00.000-07:00

‎Perhaps unsurprisingly, in America the government treats heroin addiction as a law enforcement problem. But elsewhere in the world governments treat it as a medical condition.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMMFWPl6ue4&feature=email

My NPR photo work in the summer of 2010

2010-10-04T09:01:00.000-07:00

Photo by Mito Habe-Evans

Muslims Worry Eid Feasts Could Be Misconstrued
by JAMIE TARABAY
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=129781717

Unearthed Ship In NYC Offers Clues Of Colonial Life
by JAMIE TARABAY
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=129175643

Arizona Fight Fuels Virginia Immigration Debate
by JAMIE TARABAY
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=129151164

Federal Jobs Give Hope To Entry-Level Job Seekers
by CAROLYN BEELER
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128545455

Frazey Ford: Tiny Desk Concert
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=129137755

NPR's Toy Stories
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128014633

Not well known projects with a unique perspective shot by photojournalists

2010-10-02T14:04:00.000-07:00

"The Price of Sex" by Mimi Chakarova
http://www.priceofsex.org/content/price-sex-women-speak

"Risings" a film by Chad Bartlett

http://www.chadbartlettphoto.com/exhibit/index.php?/film/risings/

Speaker at IV DC Picture Show, organized by American Society of Picture Professionals (ASPP)

2010-08-07T13:58:00.000-07:00

July 15, 2010
Washington, DC

Presented NEVERLAND and "Born Addicts: Drug Addicted Babies in the United States"

http://www.asppdcsouth.com/2010/06/iv-dc-picture-show-on-july-15-2010/

"Neverland" selected to be screened at 2010 Ohio Shorts festival

2010-04-15T16:12:00.000-07:00

Saturday, May 8, 7pm
Film/Video Theater
Wexner Center for the Arts
1871 N High St
Columbus, OH 43210

Neverland (2009, 12 mins., 27 secs.), Yanina Manolova, Athens.
A documentary that details the individual struggles of five Appalachian women during a period in their recovery from substance abuse and domestic violence. Most of them are mothers who have lost custody of their children. All five women graduated from the Rural Women's Recovery Program in Athens, OH.

http://www.wexarts.org/fv/ohioshorts/

"Neverland" and "Born Addicts: Drug Addicted Babies in the United States" will be presented at Ohio Women's Symposium, organized by ODADAS

2010-04-15T16:08:00.000-07:00

"Neverland: Appalachian Women- Domestic Violence, Substance Abuse and Recovery" and "Born Addicts: Drug Addicted Babies in the United States" will be presented at the 2010 Ohio Women's Symposium on May 19 at Doubletree Hotel, Columbus/Worthington, organized by The Ohio Department of Alcohol and Drug Addiction Services (ODADAS). This event is designed to help enhance the quality and effectiveness of Ohio’s gender-specific alcohol and other drug prevention, treatment and recovery services system. This year, the Symposium will offer keynote speakers with expertise in opiate addiction treatment, recovery management, family-centered treatment and trauma-informed care, among other topics.

"Neverland" and "Born Addicts:Drug Addicted Babies in the United States" presented at the monthly Ohio Women’s Network of Treatment Providers meeting

2010-04-15T16:05:00.000-07:00

March 12, 2010

Columbus, Ohio

NEVERLAND will be presented at the International Women's Day Festival, organized by the Women's Center at Ohio University

2010-03-01T19:15:00.000-08:00

International Women's Day Festival
Sunday, March 7, 2010, 2-6 PM
Baker Center Ballroom, Ohio University
NEVERLAND will be presented between 3:30-3:45 PM
Guest: Jessica from NEVERLAND

http://vimeo.com/9770611

*Drawing on the poster by A. S. (recovering woman, Rural Women's Recovery Program, Athens, Ohio, 2008)

"Were you ever that scared child? The one that felt so lost and so all alone? All my life, I just wanted somebody to love me. And i never really felt like anybody loved me. Soon I was in search of acceptance and approval. And if you said you were never going to love me, somehow i convinced myself I could make you love me. I never knew what the definition of family meant. What was to be a safe heaven was something I feared to go home to. I have been mentally, physically and sexually abused since as early in my childhood as I can remember which led me to liquor, pills, crack, or any type of dope that was going to take me to another level to keep me from feeling what I was feeling." /A.S./

Спомен за Лиско

2010-01-23T14:41:00.000-08:00

Котето от детството ми- Лиско, беше верен другар 19 години. Почина на 15 Декември, 2009-а година, няколко часа преди самолета да кацне в България, където не се бях прибирала от година и половина.
Лиско, правеше всеки мой ден усмихнат с пакостите и закачките си. Ще ми липсва завинаги.

"Walking Thru Hale" by Angie Pelphrey

2010-01-16T07:56:00.001-08:00

"A Little Girl's Dream"

There she was, a little girl, who always seemed to live in the shadows. She used to wish so hard for just one friend to play with her. She wanted a mom who would hold her and hug her, and let her sit on her lap. She dreamed of being the popular one, with lots of friends and parents who would smile and laugh with her, people who would sometimes listen to what she wanted to say. She wanted to know that she was a smart girl. But as much as she wanted these things, she knew better, because she was bad. Most people were scared of her, and didn't like her. Her biggest dream was to grow up and be an airline stewardess. She wanted to fly all over the world. Just fly away. Fly to places where she could have lots of friends in faraway places. When she told her mom, her mom said, "A stewardess is nothing but a waitress in the air." Her dream ended. Her mom told her she could be a waitress , right here on the ground, because that's all she'd ever be. She never dreamed again.

Иво (15.12.1979 - 03.08.2009)

2009-08-03T19:35:00.000-07:00

Не сме сигурни дали сънуваме, докато някой с огромни, плашещи ръце те отнема.
Спряхме дори да те забелязваме. Онзи твой свят ни бе непознат. Всяко твое помръдване и различност ни отдалечаваше. Отговор нямахме, само тихо и бавно изпращане. Изпратихме те преди да си тръгнеш. А когато си отиде завинаги, притихнали се чудехме дали някога те е имало. Само за едно нещо винаги бяхме сигурни- че те обичаме.
Често когато се стъмне ще си спомняме за теб и улицата на която израстнахме. Същата тази улица, която те галеше с гласовете на близките ти и ти обещаваше приказно бъдеще.

Ще ни липсваш завинаги.

Почивай в мир, Иво...

"NEVERLAND" a short film by Yanina Manolova

2009-06-29T15:39:00.000-07:00

http://www.soulalpha.com/video/2/neverland/index.html

Neverland details my experiences while living among several Appalachian women during a period of their recovery from substance abuse and domestic violence. Adequate awareness needs to be raised regarding the correlation between these two issues since many of these women end up in the cycle of addiction as a result of incest or family violence. Only about 2 percent of government funding for drug and substance abuse is used for prevention, while the rest is spent on substance abuse treatment, and secondary consequences such as prosecuting and putting offenders in prison. The state of Ohio is still in a desperate need of drug reform to address drug abuse as a public health rather than criminal justice issue.

Yanina Manolova
Athens, Ohio
June, 2009

Yanina Manolova © 2009

Cry baby

2009-06-22T17:57:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjD4eWEUgMM

"Sometimes we've got to sing this song..Sometimes we've got to sing out of key.." /Hooverphonic/

2009-06-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R56TQw6onto&feature=related

My recent inspiration- Hooverphonic

2009-06-02T13:34:00.000-07:00

"Every Time We Live Together We Die a Bit More"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTtK5cXBlF4

"Nirvana Blue"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOVjkehX0GM

"I just jumped out in the open
without knowing if my parachute would save me
it's quiet and peaceful in this emotional nirvana blue
'cause taking off was so easy
but landing very rough
no tears
no smile
not even the urge to cry
your portrait is fading
raw canvas remaining
as a white page in my soul."

"Mad About You"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0d_b3TtW-Tk

"We All Float"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijTCjtqnZ_8

"The wind is telling stories about us
writing words with sand and powder dust
deserted squares and lonesome trees
the wind revealing stories about us
We all float
on clouds of gold
the mountains make the sun rise
your rainbow colored eyes can change the tide...."

"You Love Me to Death"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYh4G4XeCZ0

"I have a dream.." /J.L./

2009-05-15T07:01:00.000-07:00

"I have a dream, a fantasy
To help me through reality
And my destination
makes it worth the while
Pushing through the darkness
still another mile
If you see the wonder of a fairy tale
You can take the future even if you fail
I believe in angels
Something good in everything I see
I believe in angels
When I know the time is right for me
Ill cross the stream - I have a dream"
/ABBA/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-raLUwXmo6s

"Fathers and Daughters"

2009-05-12T12:18:00.000-07:00

http://www.menweb.org/daughter.htm

Are fathers important in daughters' lives? Is it worse to have an absent father, or an abusive father?

"I know at school, we always comment on the fact that we can easily pick out the kids who have a father positively active and involved in their lives...it shows in all areas, academic, social, and behavioral." /Rene/

"In a nutshell you could say a girl learns how to be a woman from mom and what it means to be a woman from dad. If dad isn't available, interested or doesn't know what to say, then she won't learn this valuable lesson from "the first man in her life." /Dan Bollinger Wabash Men's Council/

“After scrupulous observations of these daughters talking to male and female interviewers, Dr. Hetherington concluded that adolescent girls growing up without fathers felt less personal control over their lives, and had more difficulty dealing with males of the species. They had no such experience in the center of their family lives.” /Lou/

“Men who have an emotionally absent father speak to the men who had physically abusive fathers and say, "At least your dad cared enough to get pissed. Having a father who didn't give a f*** is worse." The men who didn't have any father around at all say to the men who had emotionally absent fathers, "At least you had a dad to look at and watch, Having no father at all meant I had to imagine what one was." /Dan/

"Promiscuity and pregnancy are classic outcomes of fatherless daughters. They're looking to define a male image for themselves through love and attention from the only available outlet - a boyfriend. She thinks he will love her if she 'gives' him what he most desires. It's as simple as that. I saw it repeated over and over again in the urban community I grew up in." /Carron/

"I see the same things in the community where I've worked for the last ten years. It's so cyclical, and becomes a way of life generation after generation. And you see the internal struggles....on one hand, these girls strongly desire a man who will be a father/husband and a constant positive presence in their life as well as their childrens....and on the other hand, they distrust men because of their experience growing up without a father, and therefore dont really expect him to stick around once they've gotten pregnant. So you watch them waver back and forth between "love me, stay with me" and "go away, I know you won't stay anyway." /Rene/

"I still find myself trying to solve other people's problems instead of working on my own. Much easier to bury the pain than to address it and work your way through it. Sometimes helping others boomerangs on you though. You think you're helping them when all of a sudden your own stuff comes to the surface and you end up dealing with it." /Chris/

"I still feel as if I don't matter to anyone. When I get depressed, that's what it's all about. I'm not important. I don't matter. No one loves me. Boo hoo. Rejection sends me into a tailspin. But as I said to you once, I'm like a cork. I keep bobbing back up. It doesn't keep me down for long because deep down I know it's not true. I do matter to someone out there. I have friends who care and who show it. So to hell with the ones who don't." /Chris/

“How are my relationships with men now? I just had my 33rd Birthday a few days ago. Giving up expectations is the hardest part.... but it is the key factor to sustainability and happiness for me. It is a long process to get to the point where you can start doing that, giving up expectations, truthfully, at a heart level. I guess the balance is giving up expectations but at the same time getting what you require and deserve. Its like a strainer: lots of 'em just kind of drop through the little holes in the bottom. Only the ones that are "big enough" stay up with you. I'm getting better at letting the "little one's" just GO through the little holes and down the drain without a part of myself going too and just having fun with the ones who stay up in the strainer part with me. Sometimes ones who passed through the strainer are poured through again - and this time they stay. Whether our parents are in our lives physically or not, our healing process is completely independent of them. In Twelve Step they say its your resentments that will kill you. I live with that believe. My resentments are what almost killed me. They can eat you up alive. Too much negative energy that I don't have space for anymore in my life. Yes, it is completely possible for any of us, no matter which way our parent was "absent," to heal. The process is long but the only requirement is commitment and willingness to break free of unconsciousness and step into consciousness. Particularly hard to do with no modeling and if we're in this situation in the first place, we probably didn't have the modeling. But if we're committed to breaking the cycle of unconsciousness we go in search of the models. If the parent has never been there at all or isn't there because they left, I think it's harder because the psychic abandonment really screws with self esteem. Negative love better than no love? Maybe. At least you have some material to work with. But it is still completely possible to heal.” /Cherylynn/

"Running to stay still" /U2/

2009-05-10T15:17:00.000-07:00

"Sweet the sin
Bitter, the taste in my mouth
I see seven towers
But I only see one way out
You got to cry without weeping
Talk without speaking
Scream without raising your voice
You know I took the poison from the poison stream
Then I floated out of here"
/U2/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhQSeVjC-_Q

Bonfire (Nelsonville, Ohio)

2009-04-30T15:20:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnio0nW-Bs8&feature=related

Fifty People One Question : London, UK

2009-04-27T12:31:00.000-07:00

http://fiftypeopleonequestion.com/locations/4-london-uk

"I'm nobody! Who are you?" by Emily Dickinson

2009-04-27T06:13:00.000-07:00

"I’m nobody! Who are you?
Are you nobody, too?
Then there’s a pair of us—don’t tell!
They ’d banish us, you know.
How dreary to be somebody!
How public, like a frog
To tell your name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!"

/Emily Dickinson/

Network (1976) movie trailer

2009-04-21T11:06:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQUBbpvXk2A

"To think that this blackest of black comedies was made in 1976 could only means two things: 1) Nothing has changed or 2) Paddy Chayefsky was seeing the future with the most disturbing clarity." /Andrea Orsini/

Le Ballon Rouge - The Red Balloon by Albert Lamorisse (1956)

2009-04-21T10:54:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UdRNOINPp8&NR=1

"Продавач на Надежда" Джани Родари

2009-04-21T10:20:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRczAM3yVvM

Ако можех да имам едно
магазинче със две полички,
бих продавал...познайте какво?
- Надежда! Надежда за всички.

Купете! С отстъпка за вас!
Всеки трябва надежда да има!
И на всеки бих давал аз,
колкото трябва за трима.

А на тоз, който няма пари
и само отвънка поглежда,
бих му дал, без да плаща дори,
всичката своя надежда.

/Джани Родари/

Fifty People. One Question : New York

2009-04-19T21:22:00.000-07:00

I just saw this video posted on facebook by Bob Sacha. Loved it.

http://fiftypeopleonequestion.com/locations/3-brooklyn-ny

Seeing

2009-04-05T17:50:00.000-07:00

"Every time you lift a camera to your face you're making a conscious decision effecting how you enter experience. When one's perspective is shifted, life itself is appended, lifted. In every effort an evolution of being, attention follows us to a new better life" - Paul Waldman

http://www.thelampp.org/

http://www.musarium.com/photo/lampp/index.html

http://www.mantoani.com/index.php#mi=2&pt=1&pi=10000&s=13&p=1&a=0&at=0

"Edit: Transform" by Zack Arias

2009-03-31T21:41:00.000-07:00

http://www.jaywestcott.com/blog/?p=63

"Who am I as a photographer? What is my voice? I don't really know what that means but it keeps me up at night..What is my vision? What is my goal? What do I bring to the table that countless others not already served up on that massive platter of visual pollution we create each and every day? Who am I? .." /Zack Arias/

"Why do we have this desire to compare ourselves with others? What is this great sickness?" /Zack Arias/

"I have so far to go.. and I am tired." /Zack Arias/

"At the end of the day it isn't this camera that matters. Chances are you have your voice. You can say whatever you want to say, right now. So what are you saying? What are you doing with the time you have right now? When you are pushing 80 and you are flat on your back with no way to speak a single word what will be going through your mind? Shutter speeds? Cool locations? That portrait series you shot and it was printed in some magazine that nobody remember the name of? So why is this so damn important now?" /Zack Arias/

"Transformation takes time..and from what I've seen in my life it really is worth the way." /Zack Arias/

BULGARIA'S ABANDONED CHILDREN by Kate Blewet, BBC London

2009-03-31T15:54:00.000-07:00

"Director Kate Blewett visits a children's care home in Bulgaria and investigates the conditions in which the children live. Following the completion of the film, the production team offered the Bulgarian Embassy in London the opportunity to comment on the findings made in the course of filming the documentary: The Social Care Home - where 75 unwanted children are growing up - is the main employer in the small village of Mogilino."

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=944239315372248151

/Отказахме се да намираме?/

2009-03-22T10:22:00.000-07:00

Няма ни.
Толкова притихнали.
Разтопихме се в безкрайна зима.
Повлечени и непотърсени
като удавник в горска тиня.
Разпети търсихме товари непосилни.

/Отказахме се да намираме?/

"You Are What You Eat" by Mark Menjivar

2009-03-15T12:23:00.000-07:00

Different and somehow inspiring project by Mark Menjivar.

/look for the gallery "You Are What You Eat"/

http://www.markmenjivar.com/

Part of his statement:

"a refrigerator is both a private and a shared space. one person likened the question, "may i photograph the interior of your fridge?" to asking someone to pose nude for the camera. each fridge is photographed "as is." nothing added, nothing taken away.

these are portraits of the rich and the poor. vegetarians, republicans, members of the nra, those left out, the under appreciated, former soldiers in hitler’s ss, dreamers, and so much more. we never know the full story of one's life."

My refrigerator

Brainwashing. Human Beings or Robots?

2009-03-15T12:14:00.000-07:00

"My Dinner with Andre"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOZ0l-uir6s

........

Reviews:

"I just finished viewing this movie and am in tears. I live in a college dorm and the level of alienation that I sense is at times unbearable. There is a lack of "stimulating" conversation, and when I try engaging people in worthwhile talk I sense that they get uncomfortable. If you are desperate to experience a real conversation then "My Dinner with Andre" will fulfill that yearning." /cwf/

"What is the meaning of Self? How is the Self constructed? What are the criteria for Sanity? Who is entitled to judge the Sanity of another? There are many more questions posed... I would seriously recommend this movie to anyone who has ever questioned the meaning, direction, and purpose of their lives." /Artchick & jhpiiiesq/

"This film addresses some fundamental questions that we still don't have the answer to all these years later. We complain and complain about how dull our lives are, how ridiculous Hollywood is, how art is dead, how numb we are to reality, even when we watch the news and see people being killed. What do we do about it? Are we all asleep, as Wally and Andre point out? Maybe we do have to take people to Mt. Everest to wake them up." /BC 989937/

"The Vagina Monologues"

2009-03-03T19:23:00.000-08:00

"Your Lost Flamingo Co. Presents Its Fifth Annual Production of Eve Ensler's The Vagina Monologues. 11 years ago Eve Ensler interviewed over 200 women of all different backgrounds and lifestyles, that resulted in the Vagina Monologues, aimed to raise money and awareness for/of violence against women, the show explores women's personal issues and experiences, being funny, poingnant, and touching. $5 all proceeds go to My Sisters Place (a local shelter for women and children in Athens, Ohio) and to benefit the women of the Democratic Republic of the Congo."
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=56669375973&ref=mf

Don McCullin

2009-02-22T09:51:00.000-08:00

http://www.horvatland.com/pages/entrevues/06-mccullin-en_en.htm

Don McCullin :"It is difficult to associate the word "dignity" with conditions such as I photograph, yet dignity is what I try to show. I find it most in the people who suffer the most, they seem to marshal the energy of dignity, because they will not surrender."

Don McCullin :"I am a professed atheist, until I find myself in serious circumstances. Then I quickly fall on my knees, in my mind if not literally, and I say : "Please God, save me from this"."

Don McCullin :"Because I am a compassionate person, and one cannot be compassionate and be divorced from religion at the same time. On the other hand, working for media involves manipulation. I have been manipulated, and I have in turn manipulated others, by recording their response to suffering and misery. So there is guilt in every direction : guilt because I don't practice religion, guilt because I was able to walk away, while this man was dying of starvation or being murdered by another man with a gun. And I am tired of guilt, tired of saying to myself : "I didn't kill that man on that photograph, I didn't starve that child." That's why I want to photograph landscapes and flowers. I am sentencing myself to peace."

Don McCullin :"In fact I feel as if the last twenty years of my life had been a total waste. People will not change. But that doesn't mean that we shouldn't fight to create a better climate, possibly by making statements about other subjects than death and misery. I didn't want to be a war photographer in the first place, I wanted to show landscapes and peace, which is what I am doing now - and which I find much harder than photographing war. It doesn't take much eyesight to photograph someone dying in front of you."

Don McCullin :"Because I feel that person's pain and I transfer it onto myself. When people look at me as if to say : "Help me" and they can't speak because their jaw is shattered, I try to respond with my eyes, I make my eyes say : "I hear you, I see you, I wish I could help you". But at the same time I am photographing them and I feel shabby, I know that, instead of helping, I am an unnecessary burden to them. I also know that, more often than not, the people I photograph will die, because whatever help may come will be too late. So when I operate alone I try to approach them with dignity. But there is no way of being dignified with dozens of newsmen around, pushing and shoving and punching each other over one injured soldier, shouting to another : "you spoilt my picture", while almost depriving the man from the oxygen around him. I look at them and think : "Who are these people ?" At night, in Beirut, they used to meet at the bar, talking about day-rates. Or someone would say to another one : "If you get the cover, you buy us champagne". They made me feel unclean. Then one day a Palestinian woman hit me, and that blow made me understand that my time was up, that I had to get away from these situations."

Don McCullin :"Dont you think that some human beings are closer than others to the energies of the universe ? This may sound ridiculous, but I know that I have a perception of coincidences, which has allowed me to get close to certain situations and to come away alive."

Don McCullin :"One difference is that the pictures in the magazines involve exploitation. The reader is exploited, the people who are photographed are exploited, the photographer is exploited, as I was by the publishers who allowed me to risk my life. When I came back to the office and showed the pictures, they would say : "God, that's terrible : make it a double page spread!" or : "That's awful, it's a good cover!". And I didn't mind, because it gave me an opportunity to go to the next war. I was like on a high."

Don McCullin :"It's not over, it will never be. I will never get through one of my living days, without these flashes coming back into my mind. I cannot walk here in Belgravia, or into Harrod's, or in Somerset, without it coming back constantly, like a television replay. Men in a doorway, crying, because these Christians in Beirut were loading their magazines to murder them, and did, in front of me, blew them away. I was with Gilles Caron when they executed two. We looked at each other and narrowed our eyes and didn't say a word for the rest of the day."

Don McCullin :"I can tell you which pictures seem to me more meaningful. One is the Biafran mother. Another one is the Indian family, with the woman lying on a stretcher. She had died of cholera, the children were crying and banging the ground, I was looking up to the sky, trying not to let them see that I was crying. I am very emotional, but people don't know this, I am expected to be the big tough John Wayne of war photography - which I don't want to be. The man kept saying : "What will I do, how will I feed my children ?" So I did something which to this day I don't feel good about : I gave him a fistful of money from my pocket. I felt unclean after that, I thought that if he had thrown it back into my face, he would have been justified. This man had five children, the smallest being a baby in his arms, like my baby, and his dead wife was lying in front of him. To me these are documents. They don't belong to the category of icons, they are not untouchable works of art, to be hung on a wall. Even if they look like an icon. It wasn't my fault if in Sabra and Shatila the light was almost biblical, if what happened in front of my eyes was like a scene out of Goya. I wasn't there to make icons. I had to bring back information, that could possibly prevent other such miseries. I don't want to be called an artist, I don't have the right to practice creativity at the expense of human suffering. Nevertheless I shoot my pictures to the best of my ability. But I am not going to any more battlefields. I may go into the streets again and photograph city people. But most probably this will draw me again to the derelict, I cannot keep away from derelict human beings."

Don McCullin :"Though I don't believe that one is meant to do more than one really good picture a year - or maybe just one in a life-time. To be consumed by your work is not a bad thing, but it's not always a good thing. Sometimes I brake off and go out and get raging blind drunk. I suppose that I can't handle the peace process. In the course of a year I used to go to four or five different wars around the world. Now I find normality a bit of a problem."

Don McCullin :"I tend to believe that what drives people mad is guilt. Guilt that they can't live with."

Don McCullin :"People are afraid of madness because they think it only brings bad things. But it doesn't. Sometimes it brings happiness to a person who otherwise would be suffering. What has kept me from madness, really, is self-discipline. Staying in line, keeping myself in check, willing myself to common sense. I keep checking and checking and checking - which on the other hand would be enough to drive you stark raving mad in the first place! By the time you arrive on the other side of the globe you are physically and mentally exhausted. And that's when you are expected to go straight into the action, right off the aeroplane. This was what I did best, the very first day I would rush into the battle, it was all I wanted."

"Madje Has Dementia" by Maggie Steber

2009-02-05T14:51:00.001-08:00

I saw this story by Maggie Steber about her mom at LOOK3 in 2008.
I felt in love with her love and tenderness towards her mother.
I was impressed by her bravery to share with the world such a personal piece of work.
For a long time I was trying to find it online but I couldn't.

Maggie just sent me the link and I'm so glad to watch it over and over again.
What a poetry.

http://bulletin.aarp.org/yourhealth/caregiving/articles/madje_has_dementia.html#

"Една жестока ножица със крясък, oтхапа злобно моите коси.."

2009-01-30T17:15:00.000-08:00

"Една жестока ножица със крясък
отхапа злобно моите коси,
разпръсна ги по пода като пясък,
гърба ми вече нищо не краси."

(Петя Дубарова)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1zMu3PKcHo

Winter in Athens, Ohio

2009-01-27T18:37:00.000-08:00

"Nowcast as of 6:07 PM EST on January 27, 2009, Athens, Ohio:

Winter Storm Warning in effect until 12 PM EST Wednesday... 6 PM to midnight...freezing rain and sleet. Total sleet accumulation around an inch. Additional ice accumulation around a tenth of an inch."

I took these portraits for my "Fill flash outside" assignment at school.

Carlos Lowry, 43, from The Plains, Ohio

"It is such a financially depressed area. I shovel snow outside of people's houses in Athens, Ohio. That's the only way I earn some money."

Charles Rose, 59, has been working as a mail deliverer in Athens, Ohio for 21 years.

Julie Elman, Assistant Professor at Ohio University, taught my publication design class, currently teaching my advanced picture editing class. Her charming dog, Olivia, on the right.

Trapped

2009-01-24T11:52:00.000-08:00

"The ants in this country spend their whole time working and the rain comes and washes away their work. The same thing happens to ants in Asia, Africa, Europe.. It's a symptom of the Universe."

(Patrick Marlow, 39, resident at The Salvation Army shelter)

"Before I started working here, I used to think "why can't these people go out and get jobs?" but since working here I've been hearing their stories, I've realized it's not that they won't go get jobs but sometimes the situation just won't let them get jobs."

(Debbie Slack, employee at The Salvation Army shelter)

"Homelessness is a trap."

(Mark Tuell, 47, resident at The Salvation Army shelter)

"I used to work at McDonalds. I got kicked out of my house.

I'm 6 months pregnant."

(A. D., 25, resident at The Salvation Army shelter)

Inauguration Day- January 20, 2009

2009-01-20T20:23:00.000-08:00

BBC NEWS | Europe | Czech EU art stokes controversy

2009-01-15T15:51:00.000-08:00

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7827762.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7827738.stm

Our role as artists is to inform and to present the reality to the viewers in an engaging, creative way. Our role is not to judge and define a whole country as a toilet just because of its unfortunate economical standing. I think David Cerni’s portrayal of Bulgaria as a toilet is rude, cynical, judgmental and not really artistic.

"Bulgaria- national protest against the criminal communist government"

2009-01-15T15:46:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDWo2m7JlAU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVdIBd50vPw

http://www.reuters.com/article/latestCrisis/idUSLE473019

"Home Away From Home" (Hotel McArthur, Ohio)

2009-01-14T18:42:00.001-08:00

"Ако си дал"

2009-01-09T18:54:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_arRgTuAt4&NR=1

An evening with the Robinette (Nelsonville, OH)

2009-01-09T15:32:00.000-08:00

"Political fallout of Bulgaria's gas crisis" by Ben Shore, BBC News, Sofia

2009-01-09T09:28:00.000-08:00

..........

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7820252.stm

"Bulgaria joined the EU to escape the label of a "Second World" country. It wanted to establish civil norms and grow into a thriving economy. EU membership was supposed to boost influence on world affairs, and improve the lot of its citizens. So while it is true that, since supplies were cut, the European Union has made Bulgaria's plight a priority, there is a perception that it could have acted earlier on behalf of one of its newest and poorest members."

Pete Souza Named Obama’s White House Photographer

2009-01-09T08:48:00.000-08:00

http://nppa.org/news_and_events/news/2009/01/souza.html

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/18424824#28653364

In the spring of 2007, I signed up for my first photojournalism class. Pete Souza taught that class at NVCC. His class has had the strongest influence on my journey as a photojournalist. Furthermore, I applied to the Ohio University's School of Visual Communication where Pete was an assistant photojournalism professor.
Congratulations on his new job as Obama’s White House Photographer!
Missing him at school and as my academic advisor at OU.

Честита Нова 2009 Година

2009-01-01T08:54:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEp2jSD4xKc

С мечти и пожелания за повече хора, градящи по-добра родина и по-добър свят.

"Baklava" Bulgarian Fairytale by Alexo Petrov

2008-12-31T10:36:00.000-08:00

Not recommended for children under 13.

http://www.vimeo.com/798114

"BANNED in BULGARIA under accusations of promoting drug use, pornography and homosexuality, the commotion generated by “Baklava” led to an investigation of the Bulgarian government and a trial against the director and producer Alexo Petrov. But beyond all the internet buzz, political ruckus and conservative outcries, Baklava’s real aim is to depict the creepy life and dangerous living conditions of Bulgarian orphans and abandoned children, through the story of two brothers reunited in a hunt for a mysterious buried treasure. Full of dream segments and surrealistic moments, Petrov’s confronting film shows the confusion generated by the social transition that the Bulgarian people are going through nowadays and their problematic search for a new identity."

http://lostvulgaros.com/baklava/

"I Photograph to Remember" Pedro Meyer

2008-12-23T10:48:00.000-08:00

http://www.pedromeyer.com/galleries/galleries.html

Playing For Change: Song Around the World "Stand By Me"

2008-12-19T16:58:00.000-08:00

Delightful.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Us-TVg40ExM

"Lapdancer", "Phonesex" and "Un Jour, La Nuit"

2008-12-19T16:05:00.000-08:00

I really enjoy the winter break. I'm taking a break from shooting too. It's my time to read, observe and (re)discover.
It was a pleasure and an inspiration to me to find out about these projects and wonderful artists.

"Lapdancer"
Photographs and interviews by Juliana Beasley
"Determined to supplement her meager income as a novice photographer, Juliana Beasley embarked on an eight-year odyssey as a professional nude dancer, specializing in “lap dances,” during which a woman dances above a seated customer, erotically brushing against his body. Though she was a professional dancer, Beasley never forgot the purpose of her studies in documentary work. Along with negligees and stilettos, she regularly brought a camera to the clubs, and began recording testimonies from the managers, dancers, and patrons. The result is Lapdancer, an inside look at the world of professional nude dancing."
http://www.amazon.com/Lapdancer-Juliana-Beasley/dp/1576871398/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1229732227&sr=8-1

"Phonesex"
Photographs by Phillip Toledano
"Phillip Toledano's Phonesex project reveals not just the identity of operators who answer the phone when you call a 1-900 number, but their desires, fears, motivations, and most memorable calls."
http://phonesexthebook.com/
"I think if all women did phone sex before they lost their virginity, they would make much better choices."
(Phone Sex Operator: Lessons for Virgins)

"Un Jour, La Nuit"
by Patrick Zachmann
"My photographs move away from the reportage to become impressionist."
http://inmotion.magnumphotos.com/essay/la-nuit

Inspiration and "The War of Art" by Steven Pressfield

2008-12-09T19:12:00.000-08:00

"School, advertising, the entire materialist culture drills us from birth to define ourselves by others' opinion. Drink this beer, get this job, look this way and everyone will love you."

"As artists and professionals it is our obligation to enact our own internal revolution, a private insurrection inside our own skulls. In this uprising we free ourselves from the tyranny of consumer culture. We overthrow the programming of advertising, movies, video games, magazines, TV, and MTV by which we have been hypnotized from the cradle. We unplug ourselves from the grid by recognizing that we will never cure our restlessness by contributing our disposable income to the bottom line of Bullshit, Inc., but only by doing our work."

("The War of Art", Steven Pressfield)

A portrait of my neighbor working on a computer in his house in Falls Church, VA on December 9, 2008.

Today, I spent my whole afternoon at Starbucks Coffee near Tysons Corner, VA.

"Welcome to Starbucks.

In our neighborhood.

The Coffee Shop.

It's a place for communication to gather.

Drink deeply.

Relax.

Inspire.

Talk."

(a sign on the wall in Starbucks Coffee in McLean, VA)

"Santa Baby" is playing on the radio at Starbucks http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbbQwecCzo8

I'm losing track of place and time. I've been feeling so guilty recently that I don't read any books so I decided to dedicate my day on reading "The War of Art" by Steven Pressfield.

I felt so inspired.

I want to share few quotes from the book:

"Indeed, stunning images and ideas arrive as if from nowhere. In fact, these seemingly spontaneous flashes are so amazing, it's hard to believe that our unworthy selves created them. From where, therefore, does our best stuff come?

These flashes of creative genius seem to arrive from out of the blue for the obvious reason: They come from the unconscious mind. In short, if the Muse exists, she does not whisper to the untalented."

"It's not the writing part that's hard. What's hard is sitting down to write. What keeps us from sitting down is Resistance."

"Most of us have two lives. The life we live, and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands Resistance."

"Resistance is the most toxic force on the planet. It is the root of more unhappiness than poverty, disease, and erectile dysfunction. To yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be."

"Henry Fonda was still throwing up before each stage performance, even when he was seventy-five. In other words, fear doesn't go away. The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day."

"Have you ever watched Inside the Actors Studio? The host, James Lipton, invariably asks his guests, "What factors make you decide to take a particular role?" The actor always answers: "Because I'm afraid of it."

"Have you been to a workshop? What better way of avoiding work than going to a workshop. But what I hate even worse is the word "support". Seeking support from friends and family is like having your people gathered around at your deathbed. It's nice, but when the ship sails, al they can do is stand on the dock waving goodbye. In fact, the more energy we spend stoking up on support from colleagues and loved ones, the weaker we become and the less capable of handling our own business."

"Someone once asked Somerset Maugham if he wrote on a schedule or only when struck by inspiration. "I write only when inspiration strikes," he replied. "Fortunately it strikes every morning at nine o'clock sharp.". That's a pro."

"The professional, on the other hand, understands delayed gratification. He is the ant, not the grasshopper;"

"if a man comes to the door of poetry untouched by the madness of the Muses, believing that technique alone will make him a good poet, he and his sane compositions never reach perfection, but utterly eclipsed by the performances of the inspired madman."

"We must do our work for its own sake, not for fortune or attention or applause."

"The professional cannot allow the actions of the others to define his reality. Tomorrow morning the critic will be gone, but the writer will still be there facing the blank page. Nothing matters but that he keep working."

"The artist committing himself to his calling has volunteered for hell, whether he knows is or not. He will be dining for the duration on a diet of isolation, rejection, self-doubt, despair, ridicule, contempt, and humiliation."

("The War of Art", Steven Pressfield)

От 20 Ноември съм в зимна ваканция. От 4 месеца не работя. За първи път от 9 години не работя. От 3 месеца уча за магистратура. Обещах си през ваканцията поне да не докосвам камера, а да довърша всичко старо недовършено. Или поне част от него.
Върнах се обратно към онова време, когато бях на 18 и учех за бакалавърска степен. Сега уча по различен начин- отговорен и всепоглъщаш. Сама в нов град и непознати хора. Самотата ми там ме натъжава, но същевременно и вдъхновява. За първи път разбрах че самотата е и креативност и свобода. Говоря за временната свобода. Не тази, която ни превръща в сервитиори сами на себе си за цял живот. Креативната самота- поглъщайки я започваме да светим като животоспасяващ фенер в гора след залез. Спасители не само на себе си, а на всеки приближил се.
Седнала съм в удобно кресло в Starbucks Coffee. Пия капучино и чета "The War of Art", Steven Pressfield. В дясно от мен гори огън в камина. В креслото срещу мен стои мъж на средна възраст с лаптоп в скута си и разговаря по телефона. До прозореца друг мъж спи дълбоко. В двете си ръце държи различни по големина тефтери, а от джоба на бялата му риза се подават две химикалки. Шум от кафемелачка и разговори от различни маси се примесват в неразбираем пъзел от думи, изпълващи кафенето.
Звучи и коледна песен “Santa Baby” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbbQwecCzo8
Весели празници!
Продължавам да чета.

"A Procession of Them" by Eugene Richards

2008-12-09T18:46:00.000-08:00

I just received this book.
Short movie "A Procession of Them" on a DVD comes together with the book.
Strong work..
http://www.utexas.edu/utpress/books/ricprc.html

Reza's lecture at National Geographic - 12/02/2008

2008-12-09T17:05:00.000-08:00

Inspirational author. Fantastic lecture.

http://photography.nationalgeographic.com/photography/photographers/photographer-reza.html
Check out "Sarajevo Girl"

Many times he referred to Rumi as his inspiration. Rumi is one of my favorite poets too. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jalal_ad-Din_Muhammad_Rumi

“Behind the veils intoxicated with love I too dance the rhythm of this moving world...” (Rumi)

Снощи бях на една от сред най-силните лекции на които някога съм била- презентация на Reza в сградата на National Geographic

Мои мисловни записки от лекцията му:

"Няма снимка по-силна на този свят от снимка на реалноста. Никоя постановъчна фотография не може да бъде по-силна от снимка на реалноста. Нищо не може да бъде по-силно от истината." (Reza)

"Бях някъде в планините из Афганистан и чух няколко момчета да се смеят. Обърнах се за да видя на какво се смеят. Видях едно момче да излиза от малкото импровизирано училище и да държи малко поникнало растение в ръцете си. В училището ги учили да съдят растения и да се грижат за тях. Попитах го какво ще прави с това растение. От отговора му се определя целия мой живот и мисия, моето бъдеще и моята мотивация да продължавам да правя това което правя. От отговора му трябва да се вземе мотивировка за всички нас, които сме на тази планета- да допринасяме според силите си за подобряване животът на онеправданите в света. Та момчето каза- Ще посадя това растение, ще се грижа за него докато стане голямо дърво." (Reza)

"The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint Exupéry

2008-12-09T16:46:00.000-08:00

"Only the children know what they are looking for," said the little prince. "They waste their time over a rag doll and it becomes very important to them; and if anybody takes it away from them, they cry . . ."

*

The next planet was inhabited by a tippler. This was a very short visit, but it plunged the little prince into deep dejection.

"What are you doing there?" he said to the tippler, whom he found settled down in silence before a collection of empty bottles and also a collection of full bottles.

"I am drinking," replied the tippler, with a lugubrious air.

"Why are you drinking?" demanded the little prince.

"So that I may forget," replied the tippler.

"Forget what?" inquired the little prince, who already was sorry for him.

"Forget that I am ashamed," the tippler confessed, hanging his head.

"Ashamed of what?" insisted the little prince, who wanted to help him.

"Ashamed of drinking!" The tipler brought his speech to an end, and shut himself up in an impregnable silence.

And the little prince went away, puzzled.

"The grown-ups are certainly very, very odd," he said to himself, as he continued on his journey.

Varna, Bulgaria, Summer 2008

2008-11-14T13:34:00.001-08:00

Избори в Щатите. Избори. Какво избираме.

2008-11-04T22:33:00.000-08:00

5 Ноември, 2008

Намирам се в Атинс, Охайо. Студентския град на Охайо Юниверсити. В историческия момент в който Барак Обама е избран от множеството от хората в страната си. 44 президент на Щатите , първи Африкан президент на Щатите.
Слушам всички тези хора около мен- всичките вълнения, всички студенти в Атинс, всички млади хора в страната които се вълнуват и вярват в щастливото бъдеще на страната си. Слушам в момента всички писъци на радост по улиците, всички коментари на превъзбуда. Всички хора които се прегръщат и усмихват.
И ми става тъжно за страната ни..България- тази в която много от вас продължават да живеят, тази в която аз отдавна не живея, тази от която мнозина продължават да изчезват,тази за която други нехаят. Тази за която крещяхме "45 години стигат. Времето е наше" и пеехме в едно с Подуене Блус бенд.
Кое време. Кой сгреши и къде и с какво сгреши. Какво се случи и продължава да се случва с родината ни.
Честито на американците за избора на демократичен кандидат президент, честито на всички които вярват в ръководителите на страната си. Къде сме ние. Кои сме ние. Кога ще се случи и в България младите хора да ходят в екстаз, вяра и удовлетворение по улиците и да очакват с усмивка бъднините си..

Molly

2008-11-01T22:08:00.000-07:00

©2008 Yanina Manolova, All rights reserved.
Health Recovery Services Inc.
Bassett House

"Bassett House, certified by the Ohio Department of Alcohol and Drug Addiction Services (ODADAS) and Ohio Department of Mental Health (ODMH) is acclaimed statewide as the cornerstone in the intensive residential treatment of adolescent addiction. Bassett House treats addiction as a disease from which young men and women, 13 to 18 years of age, can recover with the support of strength-based, family focused therapeutic intervention. "

After Molly H., 18, spent 28 days in prison, she was court ordered treatment at the Bassett House in Athens, Ohio. She was using cocaine, marihuana, and mostly heroin. Molly H. has a twin sister who was in treatment at the Bassett House before her. " I came here the day she left. We've never been apart for more than 12 hours until we were sent to jail. I'm court ordered not to see her and can't talk to her. She was sneaking drugs to me. But I love Morgan. She is the only person I want to be with. I normally deal with things by using drugs and now I'm in here and started substituting by cutting, harming myself. Punishing myself for what I have done," Molly H. said. Molly's parents are divorced since 8 years. Her mother lives with Molly’s twin sister- Morgan H. and works as a dog groomer. “My mom drinks and smokes marijuana. I love her. She never tries to make my life harder. My dad is an insurance agent. He is conservative.” Molly H. added.

Note: Molly has started drawing since she went to prison.

She is talented, creative, and a sensitive young person. I strongly believe that one day her dream to sign up for fine art classes and to study for a psychiatrist will become true.

This is for you, Molly - Arizona Dream

Alone We Cry for the Moon Ohio

2008-10-26T13:57:00.000-07:00

©2008 Yanina Manolova, All rights reserved.

On October 22, 2008, in Nelsonville, Ohio, Bradley Mesaros, 8, left, feeds his brother Blake Mesaros, 6, center. Blake Mesaros has a ventricular septal defect (VSD). Their parents are separated. Their mother lives with her boyfriend. "Blake has the VSD since one month old. He is behind in development.", their mother Tonya Mesaros said. Alexis Robinette, 6, right, has dinner at her neighbor's trailer. Alexis is diagnosed with Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

On October 22, 2008, in Nelsonville, Ohio, Alexis Robinette, 6, plays on the floor in a neighbor's trailer. Alexis is diagnosed with Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). She lives in a trailer with her two other siblings, her mother, and her stepfather. Her mother is diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). Her stepfather is diagnosed with bipolar disorder and some symptoms of schizophrenia. According to her mother, Alexis doesn’t like her stepfather. The Robinette family lives mainly on welfare help.

On October 22, 2008, in her house in Nelsonville, Ohio, Tonya Mesaros, 32, embraces her boyfriend, Ray Holley, 26, a gravedigger, while talking to their neighbor Christina Robinette. Mesaros and Holley have been living together for two weeks. Mesaros is in the middle of divorce with her husband, who was an alcoholic. “He scared me a lot. He was verbally abusive in front of our children. When he was drunk, he was kicking the chairs, and he even pointed a gun at me. He was in Iraq for 6 months. His mom believes that most of his problems are because of the Iraq experience.”, Tonya Mesaros said. She was married to her husband for 16 years, had 4 children with him, and all of them currently live with her and her boyfriend.

On October 22, 2008, Christina Robinette, center, washes in the sink her son Dakota Robinette, 2, right. Dakota's sister, Devynne Robinette, 3, front, eats cereal on the counter top. Their father, Shawn Robinette, back, cooks dinner. Christina Robinette is diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). Shawn Robinette is diagnosed with bipolar disorder and some symptoms of schizophrenia.

"This world is not my home"

2008-10-17T20:22:00.000-07:00

"This is not our world. This is Satan's world. We are just passing through. Winning souls."

"I read a lot, cried a lot, thought a lot. Even in my worst sin, the Father was there. He said- I would never leave you, nor forsake you."

Thomas Thompson S.R. (left, second photo) and Linda Thompson (right, second photo) have been living together for 25 years. When they got married, he was 32 and she was 18. "No man take apart what God has join together. Till death tears us apart," Linda Thompson said. Their son, Thomas Thompson J.R. (left, first photo), 32, has been living with them since age of 19.

They have 3 dogs. "I like big family. I communicated better with animals than I did with people." Linda Thompson added.

"You sat in my house today and you don't know how many angels are around us. Hm. More than you can imagine. I have my 9 spiritual children, my 9 grandchildren, my grand grandchildren, and those who need help along the way. A gift the Father has given me. For every blessing he gives me, I make sure someone gets something in return. He says- Don't let love die here. Pass it along. And Jesus says- I give you another commitment. Love one another, as I have loved you. ." (Linda Thompson)

Summer Projects, Bulgaria, August 2008

2008-10-06T22:11:00.000-07:00

The Juvenile Detention Center, in the city of Boichinovtsi, Bulgaria is the only juvenile correctional facility for boys in the country. It is located in Northwestern Bulgaria, close to the city of Montana. As of August 4, 2008, the Center was home to 75 juveniles between the ages of 14 and 21, all of whom have committed crimes. About 50% are from the Roma ethnic minority, 30% are of Turkish ethnic origin, and 20% are Bulgarians. Many of the juveniles come from large, poor families. In these cultures, it is common for mothers to give birth to many children in order to become eligible for social services from the government. Most of these children have not received any education. Many are victims of unfortunate family environments where their parents have not adequately cared for their children. They end up in the juvenile detention center for theft or rape; others are sentenced to serve 10 years for murder. Once their sentence is complete, they leave the detention center, but many of them commit another crime and end up either returning to the Detention Center, or being sentenced to any of the adult prisons throughout the country. For most of the juveniles, it is an endless cycle of detention.

Thousands of followers of Peter Deunov from Bulgaria and abroad celebrate on August 19, 2008, the biggest holiday for the White Brotherhood- the first day of the new divine year in the Seven Lakes region of the Rila Mountain, Bulgaria.

The visitors of the hot mineral water pool "Giola" in Varna, Bulgaria, believe in the healing power of the 122 Degrees Fahrenheit mineral water.

Alone We Cry for the Moon Ohio

2008-09-19T21:00:00.000-07:00

I took these photos during my second week in Ohio. As usual, I drove around the area and I was almost ready to give up looking when I saw a car repair service on the road and one of the guys pointed me where to go and to find these people. The woman on the first two photos is Mary Frances, 88. On September 19, 1949, she moved to live in this house with her husband. She has one son. Today is September 19, 2008- she has been living for 59 years in the same house. Her husband passed away 20 years ago. She lives alone in the house.

The people in the third photo are Mac Amodio, 82, and Maye Amodio, 75. They have been living for 41 years in this house. They have been together for 53 years. They have three children. In 2000, Maye had a stroke. Moreover, Mac is diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer’s disease.

Alone We Cry for the Moon Ohio

2008-09-15T20:15:00.000-07:00

I arrived in Athens, OH on September 4, 2008. I took these photos during my first week in Ohio. I drove around the area and found 4 different families living in small, poor neighborhoods, located about 20 miles away from Athens. I spent some time photographing mainly The Robinette family. They have three children and live in a trailer. Shawn Robinette /the father/ is diagnosed with bipolar disorder and some symptoms of schizophrenia, his wife Christina is diagnosed with ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) and her daughter from previous relationship, Alexis, 6, is diagnosed with ADHD (Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder). “Sometimes, the things don’t work the way you want”, John Lehman /Robinette’s neighbor/ said.

The family of Perry /the last 4 photos/ take care of their 3 grand grandchildren. Jade Perry (the grand grandmother) and her husband Francois Perry are 86-year-old.

Introduction

2008-08-29T20:42:00.000-07:00

What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.

(T.S. Eliot)